John Furie Zacharias
having a bad day in a strange place
Thunderstorms Anywhere

Thunderstorms in the Imajica



 The different ways I don't like you 
 in a list that may never become organized
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Monday, March 19, 2007
Cardboard Boxes


 Lite Brite Pr0n 
 by JfZ
When I'm not wasting time playing with the online Lite•Brite, or downloading porn from The Hun, I'm usually creating simple little graphics for some reason or another.  If someone asks you about the GIF animation on the left, like your kid (or boss!) looking over your shoulder right now, just explain that the Lite•Brite Lady is just getting a closer look at the Lite•Brite Man's shiny belt buckle.  Problem solved.  I've been working on HelpForum, tweaking out the basics there, too.  While there's no porn to be found, there are some excellent entries by "The Contributors," a newly formed team of technicals, artists, and life coaches.  If you haven't visited the HelpForum blog yet, go there now.  Subscribe to our feed, bookmark the page, and make your presence known to us.  That way, if you ever need help with your blog, love life or an invasion of pirates — we'll help you out because we'll know you ahead of time.

I also seem to be spending a great deal of time worrying about ice cubes.  I never have enough of them.  I'm OCD about my ice cube supply.  I get really irritated with anyone who leaves two ice cubes in the tray that holds sixteen ice cubes and then sticks that back in my freezer.

I also got motivated to write an article with many links on Brilliant Weeds.

I'm not a very domesticated man, but I don't mess about concerning my ice cubes.  Once you crack those cubes from the tray, just put them in the plastic container and refill the tray with water.  It's a simple procedure.  I really shouldn't have to go into these detailed instructions about the whole matter, should I?

 Change a bulb, 
 change the world

I was finally able to buy a 3-pack of CFLs this past week.  A friend wanted some help with an around-the-house project, and I jumped on the opportunity to wander the chasms of the big box store and snag my swirls.  I also bought 3 bags of red cedar mulch to motivate me to leave the interior of my house and walk around my yard in daylight.  It wasn't a big shopping spree, because I'm not an impulse buyer, but I did remember to grab a 4-pack of AAA batteries for my camera on the way out.  My first big box experience of Spring 2007 only cost me only $20.  I'm feeling good about my judgement and self-restraint there.

You have to ease into these things slowly.  In another time and place of my recent past, I used to spend about $10,000 / year in the Home Depots, Lowes, landscaping suppliers, lumber yards and hardware stores.  And yes, I used to do the Home Improvement man-monkey bark that Tim Allen created, if I saw a great tool as I walked down the aisles.  If I didn't mimic it out loud, I'd certainly hear it in my head as I read about all the cool stuff this tool in my paws could do from its description on its cardboard box.

When you're a little kid, you read the back of the cereal box as you get ready for school.  When a boy grows up, however, he just moves on to read another set of cardboard boxes for things like: power tools, car parts, technology stuff and porn DVDs.  Depending upon a man's lifestyle, his morning reading may involve his religious scriptures, the Wall Street Journal or Financial Times, or just the label on his underwear to make sure he doesn't wear them backwards.

Even so, if you really want to see a grown man's eyes sparkle — hand him a new carboard box — preferably one with pictures on it.  Then again, it might just be me ...



Currently listening to:
Lost
By Museum



Posted at 12:10 am by John Furie Zacharias

 

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